yesterday's trng wasnt gd to begin with. we played d numbers thingy, i get d part wher coach said we got to get ready way before our number is gona get called. but, others dun get tt i gues, so yeah.. i was slow to react.
2side, started off behind jon. again. hah. but i drifted to d middle n stayed dere. dere were times i was lost again. n i lost it. dang. it didnt occur to me den, tt it was d accumulation of everythin. i cant do anytin wen ppl scream.
note:scream: a high loud sound made with your voice because you're very frightened, angry, hurt or excited. shout: to say something very loudlyk, dere r many other definitions for these 2 words but here's one of each. wen i hv d ball, ppl screaming, tellin me wat to do. il jus freeze. cant u jus shout. say loudly without any indication of d feeling ur feeling. its just soccer dammit.
so anw, ive been told, i can b emotional. n i shud curb tt!
but den again, i dun do it as often as some ppl. so it cant b helped wen i do burst. dang.
but tt wasnt an excuse to wat i did.
i tink i played better aftr lettin tt out. but. argh. im not proud of it.
so yeah. im not sad. well, mayb jus a lil. ur leaving.. but its not jus tt.
its foggy ahead. i need assurance?
n some ppl alrdi got deir acceptance letter! n im anxiously checkin d letter box everynite for tt envelope. even if i dun get in, jus tell me asap ok. get it over n done with.
i hope il do ok ltr. i jus need time. tts all. i can do dis. i want to do dis.

// im ok