i forced myself out of my prev hell hole. it was enriching in certain aspects. but i wanted out.
n im out.
i want to start anew. i want things i didnt hv. i want those values tt was lost. i want evrything i didnt have and i know i could have.
i want a piece of plain paper n write nice words, doodle on it, colour it, prob tear abit of the edge.
i want u to help me.
im not sure if im getting wat i want. im not sure if i came out the right way.
i hate it wen im not sure.
i dont like speculating. but sumtimes things jus drop down from the sky n land on my lap.
so, is seeing believing? not necessarily true?
wen can we ever be sure?
and im so afraid to know the truth. i dont ask. il jus wait here n wonder.
wait n wonder til i can hear my brain cells sizzling n den disintegrating.

// ------------------