sori for tt mean post. i was mad la.
anw, i watched d island last nite. i tink it was a gr8 show. i mean.. its like a whole topic to talk abt. cloning n stuff. human rights. bla bla.. it was gr8 watchin wif baba cos we always discuss these crappy things. yeah..
some ppl dun like it. yeah..
d characters were great. d chase scene was superb. d vehicles were way cool.. i wudnt mind watching it again seh.

today's match against paya lebar. wish us luck. yep.
7pm queenstown std. open to public, entrance fee is free. so yeah.
come.

// i'd do anything to survive

lepas satu, satu. biler nak game.
bodoh.

'kecik-kecik taknak mati, dah besar menyusah kan orang.'

// u said fuck, i shud respect u? wat d fuck is wrong wif u?

hey.. gd noon. woke up n had my breakfast. my breakfast.. but ur lunch. haha. woke up n saw a spread on d dining table. yummmmy. jus sat down for awhile cos my i cudnt tke d debate goin on between my parents. so yeah.. here i m now. i thot i wana continue eating the hashbrowns.
now, y is a hashbrown, called a hashbrown?

moving on..
il b heading down to buona vista to c d finals. hope dey do good. den shud b sending dem til d NEL. cant go all d way to bowen cos i hv to go to wrk. damn. hope dey do good too. talkin abt competitions, i wonder how d lil guys r doin. aftr their losses on those day tt i watched, i dun tink dey cud proceed to d next round. miss dem la..

// counting the days till we meet again

hey. mrng. nyai got admitted into d hopst last nite. she was sick since 4pm. i wasnt sure wat to do. ayah called wak mah to come over n wen ibu came bck dey called d ambulance. n she was wheeled away. oh baba was at home to pass some mags n helped to carry nyai. shidah saw d ambulance wen she came back. she was like "knape? knape? knape?"
told abang abt it wen he got bck n it took him quite some time to digest d news.

so im gona go bathe soon n den go get her ic over at wak mah's n den head over to outram. duno if i can make it to trng tho.

// my mummy's mad

i wake up everyday with nothing to look forward to.
life's so mundane.
empty conversations entertain me.
half naked ppl in d tube passes my time.
i live to eat. not eat to live.
no, dont ask me out wen u read this. il b too lazy.
im just tellin you that im bored n im not goin to do anything abt it.
right.

// come back to my right

im not sleepy. ive been surfing n surfing. n im so bored now. was it bcos of d chix soup i drank jus now. its irritating.
i trimmed my hair jus now. its shorter. n its not nice. no no.. its still long. but shorter. geddit? ofcos u do. im sure ur not dumb. rite. so yeah.
started work slow. cos i was slpy. argh. wrong timing la. crappiness. den i was ok. but den no sale. so yeah. wrk sucked.
my toe looked so ugly i dun dare look at it. (huh?) yeah. but it doesnt hurt la. funny kan. so thursday il b goin to trng. will b tough cos its paya lebar on sunday for us.
ish.. u noe wat? next week is my bday. haha. my bday. wow. im goin to b 20. n i dun even feel like im even 16? haha.. madness.
k. prob its jus bcos its almost 3 am, tts y dis post is so irrelevant.

// missing the little guys

ive changed d skin. haha. its dark again. light coloured skin nvr had a gd shelf life wif me.
will update again ltr wen i wake up.

// burn rubbbbber

it was baba's bday. wanted to watch the island. but we were late due to i duno wat. so we just settled for a sakae lunch buffet. we ate, argued, i got nagged at, laughed, joked, n den got nagged at again. pure fun. madness. hah. took neos. den took a bus. i went to wrk. baba went to wrk. it was fun. happy 33rd once again.

got a sale. yeah. went home late cos i had horlicks n i was listening to a story. haha. interesting.

// why do people lie?

k i know i say this like every week. BUT seriously, we could have gotten a draw!
d last goal BA 'scored' shudnt hv counted. it was out. even dey said it themselves. it was a draw. we deserved to hv d 2 points.
but like sham said, 'soccer can b a cruel game.'

oh yah, i injured my toe. self inflicted. like always. i tink its due to d hole of my sock, my toe got d worst blister anyone could hv. its like d friction was so great, the flesh was like torn off n now pus is coming out. n oozing down my feet. i actually wanted to post a pic of it here. but thot against it, its too intense. it was so difficult to slp last nite cos my toe was throbbing hard. n now, im so scared to tke a shower cos i know d pain will kil me. HELP!

but other den tt, i tink our defence played great. an came. n i was loving it. i like playing defence when an is d last man. she's always so encouraging n always giving instructions. haiz... my fren came over to spectate. centre's gone he said. our lone stiker is sucha young girl. cant expect much from her can we. we hv no choice but to b playin d boring strategy. for every match.
next match is against paya lebar. well, i can only say, 'the ball is round.'

today is baba's 33rd bday. happy bday to u.

// i never conquered, i rarely came

rmb dere was dis time wen i heard ur voice, my heart hurts so much.
physically. like i wanted to die.
its comin bck again. thnk god its not tt bad now.
im sori, but its d truth.

// what do i type here?

tt day it was runn den it was muhsin. n now its me. eye infection. n slight fever. 2 days mc. haha..
my fault la, slp, didnt tke out d lenses. specs for me for d next 2 weeks.

last nite, starhub DnD. it was erm.. interesting. 1st of all, im glad i came late. cos dey started late. d food was ok. n d host was grrreat! if not for him, i tink il die cos of d mega high decibels or boredom. somehow d older ones were having so much fun. it was kinda fun observing them.. observing the banquet staff was interesting too. it was an overwhelming experience.

oh! saw nic n is last nite on d way bck. long time no c huh!

// he's scared of balloons

hmm.. so where do i start?
lets just begin on d journey to d tanglin pitch. me nik no'ne din bala n aidil met at d bus stop outside park mall. took d bus. alighted at d bus stop. duh. k crap. den we walked n walked n walked. saw so many abandoned builidings. it was creepy.. but interesting. we walked downhill, across d muddy field. n dere it was. d fields. it was weird. somehow.
mak took us for d trng cos d coaches had deir boys' frenly to attend to. we were like trng n lookin at d match. mak's trng was fun. i especially liked d drill where we split into 3 rows n den kick.
wen d match ended we got to use d field n did shooting n crosses. fun. its great la to train wif d boys cos dey help alot.

coach kinda give us instructions on wat we gotta do for d next 2 weeks. n yes, 'we'll give dem hell, so he'll give us hell.' huh? tt doesnt exactly sound rite.. hhaha.. but yeah. all d best to him n all all of us.

n so today, its my dnd. rite now, im not excited la. even feel like not goin. wth. wat only sia me. but yeah, il go, n il hv fun. i will. i hv to.

k im hungry. gtg.

// how can i stand here with you and not be moved by you?

changed d skin. hope i wun get sick of dis one just as fast.
cudnt slp late today cos my mum dragged me to d bank n d market. but i had pratas anw at d coffeeshop. my dad jus looked at us. hah. cos he had brkfast wif oj.

anw, i jus wana say tt my team leaders n supervisor are a nice buncha ppl. i rili like dem alot.

k i gtg go get ready. mus go change my sandals. haaaaaizzzz. lazy nye.

// when you're gone

jus wana say tt i caught manhunt on 5! yeah yeah i know jon johnson won.. but yeah men! i caught d guys on tv. like finally.
n i aslo caught d re runs of desperate housewives n one tree hill!
hahah!
technology..

// summer has come and gone

its happening again.
n dis time round, deres no one else to blame.
except me.
ur here but no. ur ignoring me.
wonder how worst id feel wen ur rili gone.
y do we keep on doing dis?
n its always always at dis time of d year.

// wonderful

its rainin very heavily. since mrng.. its so cold n i hvnt had my shower. aqilah's getting better. she's walkin ard d house n playing d sims n watching tv. her appetites gettin better too.

last nite, i was set on not goin to wrk aftr trng ltr. i wonder y? cos i actually had to.. wat was i tinkin?

man.. wat is wrong wif me? i hvnt been tinkin straight la. like deres so many things in me but i duno wat dey r. n it jus bothers me. watever IT is! argh! its irritating me.

hungry hungry.. lazy lazy..

i need a fuckin hug la.

// mungkin nanti

its a wet monday. i woke up wif a stiff neck. it hurts. cudnt slp last nite. tossinf n turning. no thnx to d tiny cut on my knee. cant understand y it hurts so much. its even barely dere.

anw, last nite had d game against ite. we lost. 2-0. it shudnt hv been. first goal was my fault. its not urs, grace. it was mine la. damn. felt so angry aftr tt. didnt make it better wen dey started screaming. but yeah, d ones who screamed consoled me like a few secs ltr. haha. mad. i even like cried la. well, teared.. not cry. cudnt concentrate for d next 5 mins aftr d goal. i tink dis is d worst game i played so far. 2nd goal was a freak goal la. it'l b a cool goal if i was in d opposing team. haha. watever. it wasnt our game. dey were d better team. dere's d second round to redeeem ourselves. to redeem myself.

hung out wif shah n sham aftr tt for awhile. exchanged views abt stuff. yeah. haaizzz.

im scared to know how our games r gonna b like for this next 2 weeks. its scary to even think abt it. oh, n titi fractured her leg. great isnt it. n d plyr jus got a yellow card. haiizzz.

had some food. chilled. n caught war of the worlds. its a scary movie. it kinda irritated me on how tom cruise wanted to live so much. i tink if i was in his situation, il jus give up n let d aliens fry me. yeah. tts me alrite. anw, it kinda taught me not to give up easily.. next time, i wun tink like tt anymore. haha. yeah rite. oh. i also dun get how dey died. 2 people told me dey died cos of d bacterias. i doubt so. y cudnt dey die wen they were killing people at d hudson bay n stuff? how come they lost their shield aftr tt? gotta get d book, probably il get a clearer pic.

heard some unbelievable news. i didnt tink it wud happen. lets jus hope it'l clear up soon.

im hungry.

// take me away

it sucks wen u cant blog abt certain things cos its not nice to blog abt those things..
den i was tinkin, wats d use of this blog if u can tblog abt everything. mite as well i jus write in those small notebooks i used to have.
but den im not schooling anymore so i dun really carry those notebooks.
but den again, since im workin i have that exercise book which contains d customers' details. but it doesnt exactly feel right to be thinkin abt those stuff while im working for that 3 pathetic hours. so basically those things that i cant blog abt are left to ferment inside my grey matter. y fement? not rot? haha.. i hv no idea.

so yeah. im jus tellin la that it sucks.

btw, my sign offs r usually lines from songs. so, yah. this one's from robbie's come undone.

// if i ever hurt u, u'l have the sweetest revenge

gd noon. woke up to c oj usng d comp. n she hasnt got ready n it was 10++++am!
gota shock n screamed at her to get her tiny cute butt into the showers.
argh. i hate to wake up in shock.
anw, we made it. haha. sent her off to tt stupid van which is always late!

tink im goin out ltr. to get some things n yeah.. other errands tt i have been putting off.
c la how k.

c! a blog IS a source of information. ~slaps hand on forehead!

// sha! sha! sha! KAKAK!

this is gonna b a long one.
anw, so many things have been happening. thnx to technology ive been corresponding with people who i dun even know existed before. im not rili gona elaborate much on it cos it wun change a damn thing. lesson learnt: trust no one.

i m gonna share with you this song i heard.
nikki dont stop - low millions
the kinda song where u could listen to over n over again n jus fantasize abt.. yeah.
that kinda song. ok, the guy's voice isnt exactly d sexiest. but the lyrics..
he must have been doing it while thinking of the lyrics.
n this nikki in the song, she sure is one hot babe im guessing.
here's a part of the song.

hotter than your swollen lips, your wet fingertips,
hotter than your blushing face, pressed against apillowcase,
hotter than your waistline, moving up and down mine,
hotter than you half open, half open.
oh Nikki don't stop, love me so good I gotta take a week off,
Nikki dont stop, till I'm outtabreath, till I'm red hot Nikki don't stop,
give it all you got, havin' you alone is like livin' adream.

runni doesnt agree with me tho. she said the song sucks. so u guys out there, find out this song n tell me wat u think abt it k.

well, today i woke up early cos of the commotion at home. thanks to my bro n parents. he never fails to make dem so worked up. well, the light we picked up is here. altho dere was some mix up. madness. cant wait for trng. cos i skipped last tues. im a skipper! i skip this n that. haha. crap.

// nikki is not to be confused with my fren and fellow defender nikita @ kak eda

ish! i forgot to say.
yesterday my graduation day.
the day i received my diploma.
hahaha! yeah men.
ok go.

// nothing in this world, that can change my mind

hey! im blogging with the new comp. haha.. sleek.
dun worry. i hvnt forgot who got my old comp back to life, so yeah.. i stil hav yet to pay back. but no worries.

last nite was madness. me n shidah were tryin to transfer our pix. but i managed to salvage very few.. some in here, some dere.. haha. got everything up ard noon. was glad whn my bro came bck. felt better somehow. cos if anythin went wrong, i know he can do sumtin abt it.

i had durians for brkfast. ayah bought dem. haha.. yeah. haha. yeah. haha. yeah. haha.
ok crap. i wanted to go dere. but den.
den i also wanted to go another place.. but den.
madness kan. macam bodoh.
hahah.

hey.. to u readers. pls tag me la wen u read my crap. i wana noe whos reading.
ok?
can k.

// n i wun call u baby anymore, eleanor..

hey. i jus wana blog on my payday. its supposed to b on every tenth of d month but since twas a sunday, d money came in on saturday. so on saturday, me n some colleagues went to eat at really nice cafe. called figs n olives. it was nice. can la.
n den i topped up my hi card. yep.
n den aftr i work. i bought d essentials. n ate dinner.
ok.

hope i have a nice day yah.

have fun reading my blog u guys.

// knee pain

hey! d parents went jb. d bro went to wrk. so its d sissies n me. kak rin came over in d mrng for d tuition. i feel bad la cos i like forgot so many things. arghhh..
had lunch at sakura. i made sure shida ate sumtin she hvnt try b4. so full. went to d arcade. played throwing games. n den i had to go to d lil girls room. saw him. hahah. he went bck dwn. chatted for like? erm.. 1 min? haha.. den headed to d bus interchange. dere was a massive downpour.. it was wet all over. didnt check my hp. so many smses. grace asked for short socks but yeah, i found out only in d bus la. slept for awhile.

we drew!against home utd. wowwee.. come to tink, im not happy. cos i dun tink i played well la. tink it was d lack of slp. i was tired n yeah i was kinda blur, especially d 1st half. rie! our top scorer! power ah she.. we scored first. den we were containing, n den fajar scored. it was nice i tink. d defenders (me inclusive!) were sleeping. gave her too much space! alot of substituitions goin on. we were containing n containing. n d score was 1-1. i was more relieved den happy wen d whistle was blown.

// win lose or draw

ok.
i came back. ate n den went online.
opened my mail. received many many mails.
2 important ones. 1, i was expecting it, d other, i was kinda half expecting it.
d next half hour. i was surfing with my mouth wide open.
i do not understand things i was seeing.
i do not. at all.

i do not know what to do next. i replied to one. to clarify. i hope things will be better.
i do not what else to do. who did wat? to who? when? how? wat else?

i thot it wud b easier. hell no.
i sure thot wrong.

// specifics please

ish. yestday dey only ran d guys' route. n dey had fun cos it was shahida's bday. n i seriously tink we need a shorter name for her. dere's alrdi another shidah in d team, n its confusing for d team wen instructions r being passed. i need help here u guys.

went suntec wif both d parents. i told my mum not to go to wrk so tt she could follow me n my dad. she said she'l come along if i called her supervisor. haha! n so i did. action seh d sup. heh.. my sups all better ah.. anw, we reached suntec, met d manager, dis young guy named clifford. tink he was intimidated by d so many qns my parents had for him. but hes a kind guy. before payin, he showed us dis latest model n reccommended it to us. n so aftr much discussion, we took up d latest model. opposite dell was andersen's ice cream.. saw sheeda n dayen!! dey werkin dere.. got 2 cones of yummy andersens ice cream for only 5 freakin bucks! haha.. dey looked gr8. n i tink dey hv stronger arms cos of d scooping of d ice cream. n den, we were walking n walkin. my mum went to risis. she wanted to buy this rili cool looking pendant. but, erm.. i tink d chain was too long or sumtin like tt? yeah.. risis sells gold plated flowers n ferns n leaves as accesories. i had no idea! n den we were hungry. so we walked back to capitol to eat at sakura! it was so cold dere. 16 degrees? i got sick aftr dinner. sneezing n coughing. it was so nice to slp in d bus.

shidah called me jus now. shes in d waiting room waiting for her turn for her drama. she was so panicky last nite. she la.. last min. hope dey all do well k. dey'r up against all those elite schs. oh, she asked me how to go farrer park. she got a game dere. haha! farrer park. i cud actually run rounds dere huh? yeah.. its an idea.... but nah.. haha..

eh, found out dis new band. jus saw at mtv hits jus now. low millions. check out their single, 'eleanor'. their album name is 'ex-girlfriends'. so cool.

// i rili wana go

gd noon ppl. home alone. d kiddies have gone to sch. d parents r out on a date. hah! i duno la where dey went. waiting for d dad to come home cos i gotta go suntec with him to pay for the new comp we getting. madness rite.. bringing tt amount of cash. hah! not sure if i can make it on time to macritchie. i hope i can la. need fitness. against home utd dis weekend!

anw, last nite. crappy start at wrk. somebody almost make me wana cry. argh. irritating. no mood.. until i had toddlers ah picking up my phone calls. irritating at 1st, but dey made me smile. so i was ok. b4 brk, jasper told me sumtin cute la. made her face so red. haha. den took pix with tt fon la dis fon la. me n adib!
n den, gonna get a combo on saturday. woohoo!
goin bck home time is always fun la. =)

oh. hira gf ajak me go party seh on saturday.. if i no game on sunday, sure i will consider. free. haiz.. haha! next time.. whenever next time is la. anw, thnx gf.

like aftr so long, i finally climbed up to my bed. but it was shortlived. my body wasnt used to it. so i had to climb down n go outside. 8-/

// welcome back girls

jus wana say tt my definition of a blog is where ppl write down deir personal thots n publish dem on to d www for d public to c.
n tts where d problem begins. wat we type mayb misintepreted by d readers.
i gues bloggers hv to b tactful wen typing or readers jus hv to not assume.
lose lose situation i suppose.
technology la.. its too fast. some ppl needs more time to catch up.

haha. i got invites (like real!) to watch d girls' match at fajar sec or d guys' match at serangoon sec. how how how?

// hello to you

aaaah!! dey came back up again..

n my dad brought dem down again.

sori ah dah u cant c it.

hey! guess wat! 2 stray kittens came into my house jus now mrng. jus b4 i send oj to sch. not sure of d breed but they were shorthaired, ginger coloured. i was scared at first. but i gave dem d milk tt i wanted to drink. n damn! dey finished 1/4 packet of d milk..
i managed to chase dem away n locked d door n send oj to her bus. thot it was d last of dem.
wen i came back. both of dem were lying at d doorstep of my house. looking so innocent. melted my soft heart... hah. brought dem in. dey were running n running n fighting n playing ard d house. cuteness.. called spca. d lady said i cud keep dem til thurs wen d spca ppl do their rounds in yishun.
in d mean while, i asked nik.. den shidah asked izyan.
one of dem even went to d toilet to pee! no joke. so smart rite..
aftr awhile, i tink dey got tired. so dey were jus lying dwn n wanting to fall aslp i gues.
tts when ibu n ayah came bck. wah! dey came back.. ibu started nagging.. den ayah jus grabbed dem by their necks n brought dem down.
so fast.. their gone. i hope dey'l b ok la. haiz....

k la. hungry. hvnt eat cos i was so worried abt dem. haha.. funny sia. cant believe i just typed tt. me not eating cos im worried of a another life? man.. tts new. hah!

// meoww

hey hey. gd monday mrng. happy youth day!
hahah.. my sissies are not schooling cos its yeah.. youth day.
my bro has sch.. n im not schooling anymore.. wat? we'r not youths?!
crappiness.

anw, yestday was our first league match. sporting westlake against the national team.
we lost 2-1. it was a great battle fought. it could have been a draw. but yeah..
cant wait for the next game. against home utd.
same time and same place.

oh. before the match last nite, went to burlington to get a phone for my sissie. dere was a mix up for awhile. cos of the forms n d guy in charge of the phones at work. aftr some time, everything was ok. shidah got a camera phone. den d family w/o my bro walked to bugis. wanted to eat at tong seng, but its a sunday n its closed. so we headed to banquet at raffles hospital. ate u-mien! now there's one more place for my dose of ban-mien! hahah! so excited. ate n ate n played with d new phone n den i forgot abt d time n den it was 5.30pm. i had to reach serangoon at 5.45pm! called coach m. called grace. haha.. didnt know how to go dere seh. walked here walked dere n den i went bck to raffles hospt asked my dad for cab fare. hah. but i took d train to paya lebar n den i took 24. thot i was freakin late wen i saw coach j's car in d carpark.. den reached d toilet, everyone was happily changing... ish. i thot dey were warming up alrdi. den my hands started to get real cold. haiz.. like always. n den d whistle was blown.......

// eh! giler kepe?

its not even 8am n my bro has created trouble! i cant believe he did it again. he even took my mp3 plyr! i thot he was better. n i thot bringing him somewhere, smsing him, asking him stuff was at least enough to let him think clearer. he seriously has a problem up there n at this point of time i seriously do not know wat to do anymore.

anw, i had a very nice lunch yestday. fussilli chix with salmon! how cool is tt? i thot il nvr taste tt anymore seh. thnx to erm... mr chicken fart! haha.. inside joke ah. only 3 ppl know.

aftr wrk met up with runn n grace. went to lorong kismis! tired n fun ah. go grace's aunt's place. her aunt is a principal of a pri sch! coolness sia..

im goin bck to slp aftr dis. (hopefully i can.) will wake up again to do some chores, pay d bills. follow dem to burlington n den play d game. im scared il b tired ltr. i will rmb not to yawn wen im at d std. haha. i jus hope d match will go well. in watever sense possible.


// wat do i type here?

hey. i got a new tagboard. d old one doesnt wrk anymore. i duno y. tag alrite. i need some excitement in my alrdi boring blog.

im tired. went to watch shidah's game. she didnt play la.. but, nvm. nxt time sure play.
anw, her team won. 1-0. interesting.

since i was at amk sec, it was so near baba's place. so we met n cycled all d way to yishun for dinner. nice la. ate til so ful like wana puke. den baba got me an ankle wrap. for sunday. yep.
thnx.

ive been receiving many many mails. especially in frenster. n ive not replied to any of them. cos i duno wat to reply. its a little overwhelming for me. speaking of which, i received another.. from someone whom ive heard alot abt n shes mailing me from somewhere very far. its a surprise. not an intrusion tho. but yeah.. wat do i do now?

anw, if u lie, n den il lie. n den she lies. n den he lies. n den they lie. we all lie!
so, y is it wrong to lie?
madness.

// drowning

well...

work's ok. not a flood of sales but tt occasional sale is dere.. so ive not given up yet.
d contract ppl r leaving. so not sure whos gonna b left. n fatin stil hvnt tell me who made her..
bluek.

sunday's our first match. against u-23. scary.. but at d same time, i cant wait too..
all d best sporting. all d best aishah. all d best left ankle...
hah!

ltr im goin to kak nora's house. woohooo.. cant wait.
den go watch shidah play! wooohooooo....

// wet