early mrng.
went out.
at home.
goin out.
go home.
den go out again.
den go home again.
weird.
its gonna b a long weekend.
got an invitation to a wedding.
got an invitation to go jb.
got an invitation to go batam.
hah! invitation?
rite.

// all other people with nothing to do

i do not know wat to blog about.
im sleeeeeeeeeeeeeppyyyy n tireeeeeeeeeeeeeeedddd...
busssssssssss orrrrrrrrrrr trrrrrrrraiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnn?
im in a fix. help.
hah hah.
hurr hurr...

btw, condolences to those who passed away to days ago.
ur god loves u.

// ok go

the thing is.. it happened. it jus did.

plans, are made to help us go through whatever journey.
plans. we plan to do this. we plan to not do this. we plan to stop this..
but we hv to rmb tt plans, can be changed, broken or jus, not even happen.
bcos plans are plan.

nothing's predictable.
d plan was for me to come trng early. but i was late. bcos me n grace had a talk.
d plan was to leave for work. but i didnt. bcos i was tired.
d plan was to not spend money. but i did.
d plan was to work at t2d. but im at starhub.
d plan was not to fall in love wif u. but i did.
d plan was not to date. but i met him.
do u get the words tt im trying to say?

im sick of all this. somebody save me from dis madness.

// i wana go away

i got so many things in my head rite now. i duno where to start. i duno how to put them in words. its a little complicating.

n its also weird tt im getting to know people who have so many similarities with each other.

im not sure wat to do. im not sure wat to say. it jus sucks. as im typing all this, my head feels like exploding. no joke. its like all d pictures and words inside are deperately trying to flow through my fingers and onto the keyboard. but this is all i have.

work is like a roller coaster ride. some days are fun, some days are not. people there are friendly. but i do miss pulling shots and getting wet and dirty, doing the dishes.

runn's wrking now. she's all grown up. gracie's goin to np. she's all grown up too.
u noe wat? i miss rimau. haiz.. but wth?

everything and everyone is changing. whether we like it or not. we gotta learn to adapt. haha. i jus rmb, tt was a topic in pri sch science. changes.

// something isnt right

gd day ppl.
i already had my lunch with ibu.
i made mashed potatoes. (instant)
n it tasted awful.
aqilah was almost late today.

yestday missed hugh jackman.
but its ok, cos il watch him on vcd ltr.
twas nice.
altho we cud do without d irritating insects.

oh. twas full moon.
i love the moon.
i dont really like stars. but they'r ok.
the mysterious moon.

// unpredictable

2 sales again today. woo hoo!
caesar salad wif salmon. power ba..
tired. tired.

garlic naan with fish keema!
i learn something new everyday.

n im beginning to hate friendster.
f is for fish.

// my finger is on the button

just wana post abt survivor. dis season is so far d weirdest.
its a 1st where a team lost every challenge consecutively.
its a 1st where someone has only herself for a team.
its a 1st where somebody actually voted herself out.
funny..
ok bye.

saw hugh jackman on tv jus now.
almost fainted! no joke.
haha. lame i know, but damn! he's HOT!
hope il b bck by 7.30 on sunday to catch d HOTTIE n mr travolta in his weirdest ever haircut.
(btw, in BE COOL, he was so smoooth. chilli palmer? isnt tt a cool name or wat?)
ok, tts me sounding like such an airhead. excuse me for d mo pls. =p

chatted wif kak rin. i jus realised im lacking something in the friends department.
i feel so pathetic. i tink i m.
a phatetic phrawn.

// everything's made to be broken.

im feeling very crrrappy.
had my FPr paper. tink i did ok. i hv to pass dis.
crrrrapppy. lack of slp. tired.
trng was fun. cos it rained.
4! 5! 6! eh, tukar tukar la! grace! where u?
but it got me a little dizzy.

sianzz. tmr friday. il b ouuuuuut.
to where? hah. i duno. but il b ouuuuuut.
ok? yeah.
sunday! hv fuuuun ah!
oooooo wweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
crappiness is sucha great feeling!
ur brain hurts, ur heart beats too fast.
hmmmm, like im high.

eh, harvey norman got sale la. digicam goin for cheap sia.
dammit. make my heart pain.

oh, btw, prev entry is a song. weird by hanson.
n 16th april. let me go by 3 doors down. ok?

// forgetfulness can be bliss

isnt it weird isnt it starnge
even though we'r just two strangers
on dis runaway train we'r both trying to find
a place in the sun lived in the shadows
but doesnt everyone
isnt it strange
how we all get a little bit weird sometimes

sitting on the side waitin for a sign
hoping that my luck will change
reaching for a hand that will understand
someone who feels the same
when you live in a cookie cutter world
being different is a sin
so u dun stand out but u dun fit in
weird

listening to buble. surfin other blogs.
hv to study soon. i have to.

normal crap evryday. haiz. i duno wat to say la.
got half a sale. complete it tmr.
gona b 1 mth at starhub now. ive had a variety of customers.
finally got some cheeky ones. not tt i wanted dem. its a nice change.
prob u wud misunderstand tt sentence. but nah, m not gona explain.

d boys lost jus now. some of dem cried. dey were not at their bestest form but dey wasted lotsa chances. hope dey'l get third la.

it past midnite n my sis not aslp yet. naughty ah she. yeah.

// cute macam kura-kura

im not sure if dere's a proper definition for d word, blog. but im guessing its this thing on d net where u want to publish anytin u want on anytin u want. yeah. probably the problem with me is, i never specify. but i thot i had to right to do anytin i want wif my blog. i duno sia. dis is crap. il jus continue doing dis. cos aftr all dis is my blog.

anw, crappy start to d day. woke up early. cos thot 5aside was real early. but actually abit later. abit only. wait n wait n wait n wait. n den only play. drew 2 games won 1 BUT didnt qualify. like wtf?
went to town. ate laksa. den walked walked. it was fun.

freakin tired. physically. n probably mentally. oh, cos i slept at 2am last nite. i wun say y. bcos u guys wud wana gues for urself. so yeah.

argh! argh! my ear pain la!

// its out

i dream ahead to what i hope for
and i turn my back on loving you
how can this love be a good thing
when i know what im going through
im torn between this life i lead and where i stand

// i thought you would understand

im cabled up again. will be able to watch 100 over channels for d next few days. hah! d tech guy who came was an old neighbour. he said i was all grown up. i didnt rmb even seeing him at all.

anw, went out wif my mum. she skipped her wrk today. cos she didnt feel like wrking. so we went to d bank to update our passbooks. n den we went to causeway point cos she wanted to buy cushion covers at metro. but she cudnt find d right one so we didnt buy any. n den she wanted to get frames for out pix at home. so i brought her to dis 1 shop but she ended up looking at other stuff. den i was tired so i wanted to sit down n she wanted to eat ice kacang. so we went up d pathetic food court. i had red rubies. n den we were chatting. n den she asked me abt my ex. n stuff. damn. she's been talking to me abt dis. its a little scary. but yeah, i was hesitant initially.. but it was ok, n i talked to her abt wat happened wen i was in upper sec. she understood.well, i tink. amazingly. hah! we went to cold storage to buy stuff for her to cook dinner before heading home. goin out wif her is always fun n tiring cos she's always full of crap. she's worst off than me. n tts fun! haha!

n i found out who topped up my card alrdi. =)

// until the stars grew dim

wed: went to sch for my revision. was jus a handful of us. mr sin was being nice. as usual. gave some tips. n went thru d calculations. i stil dun understand how i cud fail. but anw, im gona use d same method i used for ND. n den il hope for d best. saw dayen n jann.. =]
twas raining so very heavily at yishun in d evening. it was so heavy i was scared. visibility was almost zero. no joke. dere were a few areas wif flash floods. anw, i left house at 6 for work. it was freakin cold in d bus. n i fell aslp. woke up wen i was in thomson. n d road was dry. it wasnt rainin at all. but dere were like jams all over. n i reached work at 7.20. oh, n i kicked a stone while rushing to work.. my toe bled. clumsiness.. at wrk, i sat at d end.. near d pantry, wif d old guys.. heh. wrk was ok la.. dry at first. but had potential customers towards d end.
had kfc chix salad at last. huge portion n it was yummy. tasted like sumtin i ate before but i juz cant figure out wat...

thurs(today): sent aqilah to sch. fed her biscuits while waitin for d bus. sent her off. ate oatmeal while playing free cell. hung out d laundry n here i am. gonna jus chill at home for d early part of d evening, before heading for trng. like finally, real trng! n i heard marsiling boys coming.. woo hoo! haha! hope it'l b fun. ibu's cooking fried noodles! i can smell it from here!
oh yah, i forgot to tell u guys, while wrkin last sunday, dis lady gave me a job offer. "a job tt pays 3-5 million in a few years" !!!!!!!!!!!! to good to be true huh? she gave me her no and told me to call her back. but i didnt. cos im not sure. haha!

// butt naked

had a choco mint pretzel last nite.
thank u!!
went home. chatted on msn, played yahoo games.
til almost 2.

sent oj to sch den my bro 4 his registration.
dere were some problems wif his fees. so we had to wait for some time.
bought drinks n headed back.
oh! saw ram din.
ate at sakura. i forgot to ask dem not to put taugeh. but i finished it anw.
im sleepy.
runni said no need come trng. come somewhere else.
muahaha. crap. but i wana go anw. wana run!
thursday den can full trng.

messed up. im so dead. im so full of crap.
n im never doing nothing abt it. tts my problem.
i got sch tmr. can u believe it? hah!

// hider

woitz.
saturday. 090405.
woke up late. surfed. chat wif nik n ppl.
ate maggi n den bathed. headed to kembangan.
1st time had a st soccer event in d evening. reached dere at 4. met shah.
hung out. b4 d rez came. somehow dere was a delay. n our matches started like close to 7.
instead of 5.
lost both matches. hvnt been trmg together for st soccer.
it was interesting.
paya lebar won 1st n 2nd, 3rd was one of d many eb teams. hah!
hung out to watch d finals n stuff. PM came. yanti let him score a goal..
dere was a carnival thingy at kampong kembangan cc.
left at 10..

sunday. work. sianz. called. n called.
lunched. nice.
den ibu called. i thot wat only..
den she say she want to subscribe.
muahaha. i was shocked actually.
but yah, il b cabled again dis friday. again.
yesssah, can watch football matches n mtv!
sup said can go off early since i got sale.
dinner. nice.
went home.

today, wrk in d evenin. aftr dis i gotta read my FPr.
i got to.

// little fool

grace! i told u i cant wake up late! argh.. i bet ur stil snoring away down at peaceful lorong kismis!
not fair.

anw, guess wat? i checked my results yestday. thnx to mr aliferiel!
n yeah, i failed my FPr again. again!
i passed d rest tho. including ND! but i forgot d grades.
cos it dun matter, i passed.
i failed. im such a loser.
damn, need to take supp paper.

ltr evenin, goin to kembangan cc. st soccer.
gracie motivated me to play well to beat d BA teams.
hahah! we will! we will!
(if only i had d same motivation for my studies...)

// dont look away

aqilah is bugging me.
she asked me where i went jus now.
i said i went out.
"go where?" "go where la?" "kakak, go whereerererereererere?????"
so very irritating.

wanted to change the blogskin last nite.
but somehow i cant download the file.
damn, il try again ltr.

im feeling many feelings.
no one will know bcos i wont tell.
u can assume all u want.
u can guess wat im feeling.
but u wud never know.

// amazed

hey, look who's back.

weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee....

bluek.

it was shortlived.

im full of crap.
ill eat alive the chicken heart.
yummy.
will mine taste the same?
sick huh?

// it gets harder the more that you know

hey. in woodlands library.
went to check out my dad's cpf thingy.
yeah.
my user name is crap.
i duno who did it.
but i hv to live wif it.
u noe sumtin, dis applies to many things.

anw, im hungry.
ok bye.